If you sell long enough, you’ll hit this wall: you’re working with a smart, engaged contact… but the deal stalls. Not because they don’t like you or the solution—because they’re not the person who can say yes.
Getting to the decision maker can feel uncomfortable, even risky. You worry you’ll offend your contact. They worry about bringing their boss in too soon. But if you want to serve your buyer—and actually get the right outcome—you must learn to reach (and de-risk) the economic decision maker.
This is a practical guide to do exactly that—ethically, buyer-first, and without turning your champion into a roadblock.
Carole teaches audiences that attitudes toward an action affect our ability to perform it — meaning that if we want to perform better in sales, we must adopt more positive attitudes toward sales. And it starts with putting buyers first.
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Most sales advice talks about beating the status quo. But that’s only half the story. In my experience, buyers are more afraid of making the wrong decision than they are of staying where they are.
Think of it like the stock market. You know investing grows wealth long-term, but volatility makes you nervous. “What if I pick the wrong stock?” So money sits in a savings account earning less, because a low return feels safer than potential loss.
Your buyers feel the same. They will stall if they can’t clearly see:
Ask yourself: Do they sign the front of the check or the back?
EDMs are usually inside the company (CEO, President, GM, VP with P&L). But sometimes external parties have veto power—boards, investors, or consultants—especially in startups or partnerships.
If they can say yes (or definitely no), they’re part of your decision web.
Don’t challenge their authority. Test the process. Here are respectful, drill-down questions that reveal who decides:
If they truly are the EDM, these questions are easy. If not, they’ll surface the names, steps, and criteria you need.
You’ll hear: “I make the recommendation—my boss doesn’t get involved.”
Buyer-first response (keep it collaborative):
“Got it—and I want to make this easy for you. In my experience, the fastest path to results is aligning early with the person who will own the risk and the budget. What’s the best way to make sure we answer their questions up front so this doesn’t get stuck later?”
If they still resist, shift to enablement:
“If looping them in isn’t workable yet, what will they care about most—ROI, time-to-value, risk mitigation, total cost? I can tailor a one-page brief or a short video that speaks directly to those points so you’re set up for a smooth ‘yes.’”
You’re not going around them; you’re protecting them from a failed internal sell.
A client’s CEO had four equal partners; we could never get all five schedules to align. Instead of pressing, we asked:
We then created two short, custom videos, each addressing the specific concerns of the missing partners and walking through the proposal sections that mattered to them. The deal closed because we spoke to each decision maker’s reality, even without a meeting.
A title doesn’t tell you how decisions get made. The process does. Use these prompts to build a clear decision map with your buyer:
This is where deals either stall in “checking on the proposal” purgatory—or accelerate because expectations are plain.
Ask for EDM access (without souring the relationship):
“Based on what we’ve scoped, we’re at the point where the budget owner typically wants to see how risk is handled and the timeline we’re promising. What’s the best way for us to include them so they’re confident and you’re not stuck relaying everything?”
If they insist they decide:
“Perfect. Once you’ve decided this is a fit, who else needs to sign off on budget, legal, or policy so we can plan the path and hit your date?”
If there’s a board/investor layer:
“Boards often look for [ROI %, payback window, compliance, change risk]. Which of those will matter most here? I’ll prep a brief you can use in their packet.”
When time is the risk:
“You mentioned you need outcomes by [date]. Given the steps you outlined, we’ll need decisions by [earlier date] to make that feasible. Should we pull forward the budget review, or adjust the target? I don’t want you committing to a timeline that isn’t realistic.”
Every step you clarify removes a little fear. Recap in writing:
When buyers can see the path, they can walk it. When they can’t, they wait.
Reaching the economic decision maker isn’t about going around people—it’s about protecting the people you’re helping and giving their organization a safe, confident way to say yes. Reduce decision fear with clear steps, tailored evidence, and realistic timelines. That’s Buyer-First.
Try this this week: Pick one active deal. Map the real decision process using the questions above. Create a 1-page value brief and a 2-minute video aimed at the budget owner’s top two risks. Ask for the intro—or equip your champion to win it.
If you got value from this, like, comment with one question you’ll use to surface the real decision path, and share this with a teammate who needs it.