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Over the past year or so, I have watched a lot of people lose their cool because of ‘something Rick did.’ It’s hard and sad to stand by and watch- but knowing why enables me to sit on my hands and let it happen. It’s a lot like when you see your kids about to make a mistake, or fall down, and your instinct is to reach out and help them, but you resist it because you know it’s for their own good to learn.
Before you decide that we are just mean, first understand that we are in the business of change. And not the ‘try-out-the-latest-cool-tech’ kind of change, or ‘this-magic-process-is-our-silver-bullet’ kind of change either. This is the deep rooted, personal beliefs about ourselves and the world at large kind of change. This is the ‘change-the-way-you think’ kind of change.
And change is really freaking hard and scary. It’s a nerve wracking, gut wrenching, uncertain of the future kind of scary. But no matter how much you know change is needed, you can’t teach someone to change. Ask any one of your friends who dated someone because they believed they could change them. How did that work out?
But can we learn to change? Can we really change who we are and the circumstances that we find ourselves in? Or are we all doomed to perpetuate the same cycles over and over?
Damn-wouldn’t that be a dismal and depressing future?
These deep philosophical questions aren’t random, if you think about it, we are all trying to change something, to make it different and better. And people can learn and change, in the right environment. If we are too comfortable, we aren’t inclined to rock the boat. If we are too scared, we may be inclined to hold on to what’s left of a sinking ship for dear life.
Most of the process we go through with people who want to increase their sales is to determine what environment they have surrounded themselves with. If it’s not an environment conducive to helping them change, we push back on those perceptions. If they aren’t willing to let it go, or accept that it's there and a hindrance, we won’t be able to help them.
Which is the sad part, because in today’s world, those who aren’t left behind the curve are able to adapt quickly.
But how do you know you are ready to learn to change? What are the conditions needed to learn to be able to learn how and what to change?
- Is the reason you are where you are someone or something else’s fault?
- Are you the smartest person you know?
- Are you impatient?
- Are you trying to live someone else’s life?
- Are most people untrustworthy?
- Do you know that what you are doing now works, something just needs to be fixed?
- Are there things you aren’t willing to give up doing, thinking, or having?
- Do you just want someone to give you the steps to do rather than try to experiment?
- Does every opportunity have a challenge?
- Is good enough, enough?
If you answered yes to any of these, you aren’t mad enough yet to accept the need to change the way you think. You may have goals, and things you hope for, but until your environment changes, you won't be able to learn.
But if the fire in your belly is bigger than the trash in your head, you can turn a yes to no and start creating an environment where you can learn to change.
