This past weekend we were visiting my in-laws. My sister in law is in real estate, and loves to watch shows like Property Brothers. In it, a couple has a house they want to sell and at the same time, a house they want to buy. Every show starts with the brothers evaluating the current house with the couple and asking the question :

"How much do you think it is worth?"

And every time, what the Property Brothers know it's worth and what the couple says are not the same. The couple think it is worth more. When I turned to my sister in-law, she rolled her eyes. "Happens every time! What is so frustrating is when people come to you because you are the "expert" and then when they don't hear what they want, they argue and then try to go find someone who tells them what they want to hear. Then come back and wonder why their house hasn't sold yet!"

This happens to us all, in all situations. Recently a group of clients commented after reviewing their evaluations, "This is so obvious, I should have known this!" followed by "How much different would things be for me now if I had known this a year ago?"

Why is it so impossible to see what is holding us back? Why do we hold fast to the very things that hold us back?

As human beings, we tend to rationalize and justify our own short comings so that we can stay inside our comfort zone. 

What do we need to do to change that? Like those in the Property Brothers show, an investment needs to be made. And sometimes, that investment makes us uncomfortable. Why? First, because we have to overcome the idea that our perception is reality. Next, we have to stop making excuses. And third, we have to ask someone else for help. And not just anyone, but the right people who know what they are doing. Sometimes it is just easier to think we can do it ourselves. 

"To the degree we're not living our dreams, our comfort zone has more control of us than we have over ourselves." - Peter McWilliam

We recently had an exchange with an inbound marketing agency owner. They profess to be able to 'provide organizations with an integrated sales and marketing strategy to increase market share and profit margins'.  

"I think I wasn't ready to pull the trigger on personal coaching when we last spoke about it because I didn't want to make the necessary changes in my own behavior. I recently have had an opportunity to go through the Sandler Training and I took it. I was lacking the mindset for getting myself better at sales, and I believe that has been changing. Sandler is definitely not an inbound-ready sales process, but much of the process seems to be sound. I know Rick has vast Sandler experience and mixed feelings about the type of salespeople it turns out. One thing that you all said to me that stuck with me was that I needed to have some more sales background if I was going to be able to help clients in the process. I'm investing in myself this year, so I hope it'll be ok to reach back out and work together when the time is right."

We replied: "You should just go away because you won't do anything that makes you uncomfortable and uncomfortable is only the beginning."

To which the owner replied: "Comfort zone has historically been a big problem."

It would be like the homeowner who thinks that their house is worth much more than it is trying to help another homeowner sell their house and buy a new one. 

Is your comfort zone holding you back from your dream?